Silver Linings

Did you ever see the Saturday Night Live skit with a family called "The Whiners"?

I remember laughing for the first few seconds and after that time it became just plain annoying.
I 've tried really hard since becoming a "one" in a world of twos, to keep from being labeled with that title.

Yes, life certainly feels unfair when everyone seems to be a pair but you. But I've learned that whining about our situations only tends to alienate us further.

I've tried instead, to concentrate on the things I am able to do now, that I never did before. Things that have empowered me as a woman. The silver linings inside our storm clouds.
My first Ms. Fix-it project was installing a closet organizer.

I didn't hold on to my hubby's clothing for long. A week or so after Ed died, I boxed up his clothing. I figured if I couldn’t have my husband, I may as well have his closet space! I did however, keep a shirt with the smell of his Grey Flannel cologne still lingering. On those really down days , I'd sneak up to the closet to get my fix. I'd breath in his scent and believe for a moment that he was standing next to me. Sound familiar?

Anyway, after designing the closet layout. I used an electric drill for the first time in my life.
I should first have used a stud finder (not a good name for a tool to be used by a lonely woman!) If I had, perhaps my closet walls wouldn't have looked like a family of woodpeckers had settled in!

The physical labor actually helped lift the days depression. It's been awhile but I suspect that a few of those "extra holes" may have been a way of working thru some anger issues.

Finally I was finished and I stepped back and admired my work. WOW it looked amazing. What took me a whole day to finish, my husband could have done in an hour. But what a sense of accomplishment I felt. I went around the house for days singing “I am woman hear me roar.”

What about you? Are you doing things that you’ve never done before? What was the first thing you did as a new widow that gave you a sense of accomplishment? I'd love to hear your stories.

My grandmother Carrie has always been an inspiration to me. She became a widow at the ripe old age of 39 and remained so until she died at age 101.

As a little girl I looked forward to her visits. She was a quiet, unassuming woman and I adored her. She had a way of making each grandchild feel as though they were her favorite, even though I’m sure it was me she liked best.

Growing up I shared her love of sewing, growing flowers, playing cards, writing poetry and short stories and I even shared her shoe size. But it wasn’t until I became a widow myself at the age of 44 that I could identify with her pain of going thru life without her mate.

I wish she was still alive. I have so many things I’d like to know about her journey thru widowhood. My grandmother wrote with a great deal of spiritualness and I’d love to know about her relationship with God and whether that relationship came about because of her struggles.

Someday I’ll see her again and thank her for inspiring, and blessing my life with her writing. I’ll end this post with my favorite poem of hers.

I Heard It Too

I walked along the garden path
I heard it in the breeze.
I heard the voice of Jesus
In all the swaying trees.

I heard it in the buttercups,
In the leaves and in the grass
In all the tiny raindrops,
In the laughter of a lass.

I heard it in the moonlight
And I know that it is true
If you’ll listen for His Kindly voice
You can say I heard it too!

I heard His voice on the mountain top
In the ocean and the sea
I heard it in a robin’s song
It meant so much to me.

I heard it in a baby’s cry,
In the chapel when I pray;
In every tiny candle
that burns from day to day.

I heard his voice when I was tired,
In the clouds that roll so high;
In the planes that circle o’er us
In the stars up in the sky.

I heard it in a mother’s sob
When things did not go right
A soothing loving whisper
That made her burdens light.

I heard it when kind deeds were done
And I know that it is true
Just stop awhile and listen
And you can say “I heard it too!”