I can still remember sitting at my mother and dads kitchen table on my tenth birthday. For some reason I calculated that in the year 1999 I would turn 50.
"I hope I die or that the world comes to an end before then." I told my shocked mother.
"Why on earth would you hope that", she asked?
"Because 50 is old and I don't want to be old, and I don't think God ever meant for us to have to go around saying 'Its the year twenty hundred'"
My mom cracked up and reminded me of that story every year on my birthday. Even when I was grown, she would call me up and sing Happy Birthday and tell me how many more years before it would be twenty hundred. Laughing she'd tell me "You better make sure you enjoy life now and not worry about getting older".
Just a month after my 5oth birthday I was given a cancer diagnosis and I began to wonder if God had been trying to tell me something all those years before. But I'm still here and I have learned to adapt (quite reluctantly) to saying Two thousand and nine etc.
But being 60... now that's a different story. I am my grandmothers age. Where did my youth go?
Oh well, for some reason I'm still here so I better do like mom said said enjoy life now and don't worry about getting older. After all 60 is the new 40 right?
Tuesday, in addition to being my birthday, it was our monthly widows get together. With Easter and the trip to Boyne Mountain with the family, I just didn't have time to do much in the way of planning a meeting. When I sent out the meeting reminder I wrote:
Easter is a time when we remember the miracle of the Resurrection and as
widows I think this is the time when we can truly identify with Jesus. Not
just identifying in his suffering, but also in his coming back to life. Do
you remember when you started to feel that life held meaning again after your
husband died? Was it something someone said to you, a place you went, or
something you did? Let’s share with each other our own Resurrection
story. I know that’s a tough question and everyone may not have an answer,
but if you do, we’d love to have you share it with all of us.
I got my own story ready to share and as I threw some pink plastic table clothes and my teacup and dish to pass in the car and headed down to the meeting I whispered "I got nothing God, no inspirational way to start the meeting, no joke to end the night with - nothing....if this meeting is going to be a sucess it's all up to you cuz I got nothing.
We had a very small meeting that night. One women was there for the first time. She drove over 30 miles to be there. She's been widow for two years. Last month at the lay ministry class I was telling some women about our group. One told me she thought our group was just what her sister in law T needed and would she mind if she gave her my phone number.
Actually I was surprised when I recieved the call from her. "I don't need to come because I'm grieving" she told me over the phone, "but I just want to be around people who understand"
Only 10 women attended the meeting that night, but it was an absolutely perfect night. The sharing that took place was unbelievable. It was a very intimate time together. And perhaps my favorite meeting of all times.
One of my friends commented how her husband had always made her laugh. She shared her husbands dying request.
Before her husband got sick ,they discussed the idea and agreed, that they would both be cremated. They instructed their children that after the surviving spouse died both of their remains were to be combined and placed in one urn.
Several years later the husband was diagnosed with cancer and given a few months to live. As the family gathered around his death bed the man called them all closer and reminded them of their promise to combine the ashes. But.....he said slowly, hardly able to breathe,......whatever you do, make sure I'm on top of your mother!
She told us how his last words filled with laughter are her life line in this world. Laughter can get you thru the tough times. Remind yourself of times you've laughed when all you want to do is cry.
Such wise words.
That's it for this post. I just want to thank God for coming thru again, and showing me for the millionth time that when I got nothing he's usually up to something
3 comments:
I'm so glad you have this group. It sounds like a wonderful group of women.
Happy belated birthday!! Love that 60 is the new 40 as that means I must only be 30! Darn we're just youngins!
This was wonderful - I laughed out loud (I really detest that LOL shorthand for this action!) at the comment about "make sure I'm on top of your mother". Perfect, and a great memory for the family to have of their husband and father - a man with a great sense of humor.
People have said that to me, too - 60 is the new 40. And you know, I sometimes feel like that, since I am recreating me - I remember doing some of this in my 40's!
BTW - I will turn 61 in early July. Happy birthday to you, Luanne!
it's been so long since i've read and caught up on your life. love your writing and reminded me that i need to remember to take my blog posts from facebook and post them on my blog as well.
life is well. god is good. and i'm glad to reconnect with you.
blessing....
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